Twelve Days Of Christmas #9

On the Ninth Day Of Christmas, Evil gave to me…

Nine Dexterous Smiles.

For such a miserable, utterly Evil bastard, Dexter Snide smiles quite a lot really. Of course, like a weapon it’s in the way that he wields it and his delivery of this expression is one of the simplest ways in which he is characterised. So for fun I thought we could collect together a handful of his best smiles in the interests of discovering what they might tell us about the man…


Sporting a smile you could grate cheese on, he stamped on the intruder’s hand. Hard.


He rewarded them all with a smile so thin it barely manifested itself in more than one dimension.


Dexter concocted a smile that would put paid to the manager’s newfound spirit, like a vet about to put down a family pet, but with none of the sympathetic overtures.


Dexter forced a smile, like he was forcing a brick through a pasta maker.


“Ah, revenge.” Now, there was something Dexter could understand. He smiled the way some people smile when remembering a favourite pudding.


Dexter erected a smile like a firewall. “What would you like to know?”


Dexter turned his head and favoured her with a smile like one of the quality butter substitutes – spreadable when cold and melts away just as easily.


Dexter gave a smile thin enough to give his enemies paper cuts.


Dexter cracked a smile and it curled like a dead autumn leaf.

Hmm, I don’t know about you, but the only conclusion I can draw from that is that he’s a real charmer.

If you wish to sample more of the man’s surgical smiles, then please check out Evil UnLtd Vol 1: The Root Of All Evil available on Kindle via Amazon .com or, or the Special Edition, with a host of Extras, available for a wide range of e-readers from smashwords. Remember also if you don’t happen to have a Kindle or a dedicated e-reader, you can download the Kindle software for FREE for your PC, Mac, iPhone, iPad, Blackberry or Android.

Don’t forget that we also offer a FREE E-Shirt with every purchase!

Enjoy. And see if Evil can’t give you something to smile about this Christmas. 🙂


1 Comment

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Simon Forward, Simon Forward. Simon Forward said: On the Ninth Day of Christmas, Evil gave to me… 9 Dexterous Smiles! #Kindle #Smashwords #ebooks #Evil #Chriskindle […]

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